17 Meditation I talked to therapists. NLP practitioners. Psychologists. Psychiatrists. I started meditating. I went on a ten-day silent retreat in a remote place. I did not take my car. I feared that I might not complete the retreat. I was meditating the whole day. Seventeen hours a day, not talking or even looking at anyone else. Just me and my thoughts. The silence became louder. I couldn’t handle it. The thoughts. It echoed in my mind like a whirlpool. I escaped after five days. Hitched a ride back to the bus station. The relief was short-lived. Soon after I got on to the bus, I felt the guilt for not completing the course. A year later, I went back. I finished the full ten days. From four in the morning till nine at night. Just me and my thoughts. Learning to manage it better. A lot of the toxins came out during meditation. I thought I’d either go crazy or come out better. I think I came out a slightly better person. I thought I’d either go mad or come out of it a better person.
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